So, like I said earlier today on bbm, I've been thinking a lot about journey vs destination. I know the destination matters a lot, but I often find myself wholly focused on the destination and not remembering that even when I reach one destination, I'm already envisioning the next. So really, my life is spent in the journey. It's a good reminder that I need to live the journey, to be present in the moments of life that will quickly pass me by when a new stage of life is ready for me.
For me, it relates a lot to the whole having a family thing. While I ache for my womb that refuses to grow a child within it, I also know that these years of just Kris and I (plus Murph!!) are precious, and won't last forever. I don't want to rationalize or trivialize how hard it is to battle infertility, which we officially are now, infertile that is. But I also want to make the most of these 'bonus years' we have as just the 2 of us, to take little trips, to be indulgent, to pay things off, to enjoy being just we two. Because we 2 is amazing, and shouldn't be a phase we just rush through, as much as we'd love to be moving on to 3.
And, maybe the destination is the journey. I think that's at least largely true, that where we're going is really just a lot of how we get there, the destination is influenced by the journey, and so part of what the destination is, or evolves to be, is the journey. And the journey is what grows us, shapes us, forms us. I need to remember that, and to remember that find the joy, grace and love in day to day living is maybe, just maybe, what the destination is.
That's maybe all a bit stream of consience, but I think (hope) it makes sense.
I'm watching Big Brother right now, I'm lame, I know. But I also brewed this pot of tea because Christen is on her way over to hang out, so yay for that!
I'm thankful that we seem to be having a bit more sunshine than we have of late, even tho there's still consistant rain. I miss there being summer in the actual summer months, but I'm definitely not taking even 20 minutes of sunshine for granted this year, that's for sure!
I'm looking forward to family camp, more so now that I'm aware of k's imminent arrival. Sorry that we're stealing her back, except barely sorry. Ha. We can't keep Murph at the camp, and we didn't look into kennels in time, so we're going to camp at Neil and Barb's and then family camp from there. I think it will actually give us a nice bit of separation, if that makes sense. I'm excited for it, and excited that Neil and Sharol are speaking!
I hope your long weekend is wonderful :) I'm very much looking forward to mine, and also, I'm now very much looking forward to sleep that will hopefully come and meet me in the next little bit. Murph is cuddled beside me, he's had quite the day, so I think he's ready for it to be bedtime too. Christen is still here, watching tv in the other room until she has to go pick up a friend at the airport, but Murph still chose to come to bed. That says a lot!
And I even emailed myself a picture of Murph's big day, and forgot to add it! Jeepers :)
Murph came to work this afternoon during the showing, here he is, helping Kimbo process a chart for payment:
Goodnight, my friend.
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